Clyde Foods presents
Clyde Burgers
Red, road-ready, and built on the correct assumption that subtlety is somebody else’s problem. Two patties is where we start.
Burgers
Two 1/2 lb patties, lettuce, tomato, jalapeños, fried egg, six types of cheese, and Clyde Sauce. The baseline burger, somehow.
Four 1/2 lb patties, 10 slices of cheese, jalapeños, and optional lettuce. We included the lettuce because apparently vegetables deserve representation.
2 × 1 lb patties, 10 slices of lo-calorie cheese, three tomatoes, kale, jalapeños, and extra lettuce. Technically a diet because we said it is.
Sides
Fries drowned in chili and buried under six cheeses. If you can still identify the fries, we were too conservative.
Same fries, extra lettuce and three tomatoes on top. Health has been achieved.
Desserts
A jumbo walnut brownie finished with cream cheese frosting. Dessert should not require restraint.
The jumbo walnut brownie with cream cheese frosting, plus lettuce and tomato on top. Nutrition has once again been solved.
Drinks
Forty-four ounces. The correct amount.
Sixteen ounces of water, improved by the word “Diet.”
Planned menu. Menu items, pricing, availability, and promotion terms may change before launch.